This is weird. I am proceeding in the opposite direction in order to solve a big problem about space, creativity, identity, and sharing. What do you think about this idea?
I have felt absolutely no room to be creative with E. By the time she goes to bed, I'm fried. We do a lot of creative stuff with her, but it involves pulling it out of cupboards and cleaning up before dinner. Often, midway, she wants to shift mediums. In theory and heart, I love this. In practice, I hate it.
We've been waiting for this craft room to happen downstairs, and I've been putting up with "creativity in compartments" because I knew a better solution was around the corner. But it's been around the corner for awhile, and -- realistically -- this craft room plan might not work until E is older and can self-direct more projects.
Also, it breaks my heart to clean up her projects in order to get dinner on the table. What would happen if she could just come back to them when she was in the mood?
Okay... meanwhile... in therapy... I'm working on how to stay sane, deal with the lack of boundaries in my family-of-origin and the difficult-but-normal lack of boundaries when one is a mom.
I spent part of a therapy session telling K that I would be evicting D from *my* office (he has this one corner filled with things he's forgotten or doesn't want to deal with... emotionally, this unclear area bugs me.). Later that day, I told my friend P that I couldn't imagine how she could cope in her house without a small space of her own.
But now I think the solution for me and E is to turn *my office* into *our creating room.*
Maybe I don't need a tomb of my own. (I often keep the shades drawn -- very out-of-character for me -- so that the room seems less inviting to others.) Maybe I need to share the space deliberately, pro-actively?
I don't know. It's crazy! This idea goes against all of the knocking-my-head-against-brick-walls that I've been doing for a year-and-a-half.
Maybe I need MORE creative connection with E instead of less. Maybe we need to sit in the same room and do our things, together?
This is a big deal, though, and it requires re-organizing most of the house. I need to find places for all of the yarn that I'm not using lately, and I need to find easy surfaces on which E can work and can keep her materials handy.
And I am going to have to figure out how to share this space and let her have her own way with her half of it.
This idea is entirely different from all of our earlier house plans. I didn't realize how firmly I had them in mind.
Okay... I'm letting go now...